Soap Box Moment

>> Saturday, October 25, 2008

I was reading Jane's blog and it really hit home with a talk I had with my daughter last night. Check out her blog because she is a very proud mama.

Here is my soap box moment.

There are parents who want to give their kids everything (the world) and I am no exception however if we do not do this responsibly how will they ever learn to live on their own? How will they know the 'rules' of life?

Jane's daughter has learned the art of couponing and works several jobs while in school. Last night my daughter and I went grocery shopping and we had a really good talk. We talked about a friend of hers that has never had to pay for anything for her mother who is a single mother pays all her expenses for her. This girl never had to do chores, work for spending money or learn the value of a dollar. It makes my daughter a little green and I understand because we all know people who seem to have it easier. A side note on this single mother she doesn't make that much money and gives to her daughter while she goes without or makes concessions on other things that are needed in her home.

I told my daughter that I love her and I would not be a good parent if I didn't teach her to survive in this world. My daughter pays her bills on time, she knows how to pay rent, buy groceries, save, work and clean house. She knows what it is like to go without and she knows the value of getting something she has worked hard to get. Does this make her special? Well yes in my mind. She can hit the street tomorrow and know how to survive can all parents say that? Does this mean she has not experienced hard times, disappointment? Of course not. That is why she is jealous sometimes, it is why we are all jealous.

What age do you begin to teach your children this lesson? Right from the beginning. How many of you have your children save some of their Christmas/birthday money and spend only part of it? How many of you have your children pick up toys, take out trash, vacuum the floor? These are lessons all children learn and it is not hard for a child to do. Some give allowances to their children and some expect that a child helps out because they are part of the family.

Are there not parents that teach their children to make things for presents instead of buying things? Are there not parents who love when their children make cookies for the first time and eat the burned ones anyway because their children are learning to fend for themselves?

Do I want to give my daughter the world? Of course I do but I can't.

Do I want my daughter to come to me if she is trouble? Of course I do and I let her know that she can do so.

Do I want to know that someday when I am gone or unable to be there for my daughter that she is strong and capable of taking care of herself and her family? Absolutely!


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